Heine's Ramblings and Rumblings

When Insults Had Class

Leave a comment

A member of Parliament to Disraeli:

“Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease.” “That depends, Sir,” said Disraeli, “whether I embrace your policies or your mistress.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He had delusions of adequacy.” – Walter Kerr

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire.” – Winston Churchill

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.”

– Clarence Darrow

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“He has never been known to use a word that might send a reader to the dictionary.” – William Faulkner (about Ernest Hemingway).

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I’ll waste no time reading it.”

– Moses Hadas

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I didn’t attend the funeral, but I sent a

nice letter saying I approved of it.”

– Mark Twain

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends..” – Oscar Wilde

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend, if you have one.” – George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
·”Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second ….if there is one.”

– Winston Churchill, in response.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I feel so miserable without you; it’s almost like having you here.” – Stephen Bishop

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He is a self-made man and worships his creator.” – John Bright

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’ve just learned about his illness. Let’s hope it’s nothing trivial.” – Irvin S. Cobb

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others.” – Samuel Johnson

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up.” – Paul Keating

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily.” – Charles, Count Talleyrand

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He loves nature in spite of what it did to him.” – Forrest Tucker

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”

– Mark Twain

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.” – Mae West

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.”- Oscar Wilde

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts…for support rather than illumination.” – Andrew Lang (1844-1912)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“He has Van Gogh’s ear for music.”- Billy Wilder

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.” – Groucho Marx.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s